Thankful

This year I have many things to be thankful for:

My new(ish) job. I know it's not the right fit for me, but after being unemployed for the longest unwanted period of my life, I am thankful to have one in this economy. I also have faith that the right gig is out there, just waiting for me to find it.

My kids. They may drive me batty and act like heathens, but they are mine. For the most part, they are healthy and happy.

My marriage. Last year at this point we were in a very bad place, but we've seemed to make a turn around. I've very thankful for a husband who didn't give up on me when he probably should have.

My family who helps me out even though none of them live near me.

Health insurance. Who isn't thankful for that?

This video (Total blackmail footage starring L):

Boots. Every girl needs a pair of boots. Me? I could use a few more pairs as I am wearing my others out.

To all who might read my blog, Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

Sore losers should be ashamed of themselves

I listen to ESPN Radio probably more than I should. I'm a sports geek like that. Today I was listening to Colin Cowherd. I'm not really a big fan of his, especially after his moronic statements about former UK star/current Wizards player John Wall, but this story he told got my attention.

This story about an 8 year old and his dad going to a football game, the boy's first, and the treatment he received after leaving the stadium.

See this boy was a fan of the winning team, which happened to be the visitor that day. Because this boy and his dad were fans of the winning team, the visitor, they were treated like crap. Obscenities were yelled, food was thrown and a little boy was hurt.

At his very first NFL game.

Those fans that did those horrible things are an embarrassment to fans everywhere. That is not the kind of person I want to be compared to as a sports fan. I think of myself as pretty passionate. After all, I am a UK fan, we aren't used to losing. I'm not naive in thinking that UK fans are sweet in a loss. I'm sure there are some that drink too much and can become complete a-holes. But causing injury to a little boy is a whole separate class of lowlife.

No one likes a sore loser. Those fans that chose to tackle a little boy? Sorest losers of them all. Be ashamed, Cleveland. Be very ashamed.

Jumping on the bandwagon a bit late....

... but here goes.

30 days of truth

I don't know if I can get through it all, but I'm willing to try.

So brace yourselves. Tomorrow it begins.

Long time, no blog

Hi there!

Did you miss me?


I know, I know. I've been a bad blogger. It's been months. In that time I started my job, L started Kindergarten, K potty-trained, and so much more.

I've missed it. Even though I have no idea how many people actually read it, I've missed it. I've gone to blog several times over the last few months and get distracted or start reading other people's blogs instead of writing for my own.

That changes today. Blogging is something I do for me, not for anyone else. I need to blog, to say what I need to say when I need to say it, to get those things off my chest. If someone connects with the words I write here, that's like a big bonus.

Here's to a renewed blogging future.

The End of a Long Journey

As of Tuesday, I will no longer be a SAHM.

As of Tuesday, I will send my daughter back to the daycare she once attended.

As of Tuesday, I will no longer spend my days searching.

As of Tuesday, I will be working once again!

My SAHM time

About a month ago we made the decision that we couldn't justify keeping K in daycare any longer. So we gave our two week notice at daycare and I became a stay at home mommy.

Let me just say that this isn't my first go at being a stay at home mom. When L was younger than K is now, I tried it for about six months. I think I made us both horribly miserable. As much as I loved my son, I quickly figured out that my kid was happier and I was happier when I worked. Along with this revelation came waves of guilt. I mean, come on, what kind of mother am I that I would rather put my kiddo in daycare, in the care of strangers, than spend the days at home with him looking into his big brown eyes? This horrible mommy, that's who.

This time, with K, has been much different. I think we've gotten into a pretty good routine. She's loves to play and help me around the house. I think I've finally gotten her to watch a 30 min kids show. I still haven't found that good balance between getting housework done and spending time with her, but it's getting better. She loves to get out and shop and can't wait to get L from school every day. We spend our days with princesses, flash cards, and food. The child snacks all day long, but that's a post for another day.

I still have those moments when I can't wait to get back to work everyday. I don't think those will ever go away. I do know that when I return to work this time, it's going to be much, much harder. I'm getting sad just thinking about it.

Ultimate Blog Party 2010

It's a party and YOU are invited!

It's funny because as I write this I am also planning a joint birthday party for my two kiddos. See we were in Walt Disney World for my oldest's birthday (he turned the big 5) but family keep asking when or what we are going to do for his birthday. Only they asked like 3 days before we left for Disney. I wasn't planning on a party for L but all these people make made me feel guilty. Since I'm unemployed still, and we were going to have a party for my almost 2 year old, we decided to throw a joint party. So now I'm trying to figure out when to have it and where. BBD rarely has a weekend off, so this complicated things. Living in the Bluegrass State, we have to work around the Kentucky Derby and the festival preceding it. The plan was to have the joint party a little before K turns two, but that might not happen. So I continue to plan and hopefully by tomorrow we will make some decisions. In the meantime, let's party here!

So, the obiligitory introductions...

I am Big Blue Momma.

I am currently unemployed and being a stay at home mom in the meantime.

I love sports, especially college basketball, college football and the NFL. We are also hockey watchers.

I have been married to Big Blue Daddy for 9 years. He works crazy hours and sometimes I feel like a single parent because of it.

I have two children:

Logan (L), 5, who loves video games probably too much. Some day I'll share his story.

Kaelin (K), 22 months, who is into everything and is a princess in every way.

I blog about unemployment, sports, my kids, my struggles with unemployment and my kids. I hope that soon I won't have to blog about my unemployment, because I'm tired of it.

Might I invite you to have some snacks? Cupcake? Party Favor?

Let the party begin!

So the party favors I want include:

• A custom blog design from Mary Hess Designs. My blog needs help badly and I would love a new look for it!
• Be My Guest Certificate ($250 value) good at any Hilton Garden Inn. I would love a couple of nights to get away somewhere fun this summer with the kiddos and I don't know if that will happen if I don't get a job soon.
• $150 gift certificate to A Rocking Horse to Love.

I would also love 71, 16, 33, 83, 20, 50, 35, 26 and anything that a 5 year old boy and an almost 2 year old girl would love! 

Our Week at Walt Disney World

Our trip to Disney was a huge success! L now thinks we will be going every year for his birthday, which won't be happening if I don't get a job, but that's another post.

We arrived very late Saturday night and were quickly checked into our room at Caribbean Beach Resort, where I had booked a pirate themed room for the birthday boy. We were taken by van to our room where we quickly changed into our pjs and hit the sack. Only problem was our luggage still hadn't arrived from the Magical Express service. Apparently there was an issue at baggage claim at the airport which added 3 hours to our delivery time. So BBD had to stay up and wait for it while the rest of us crashed.

Our first day was spent at Epcot. We started the morning with a visit to Norway for the princess breakfast there. It was K's first experience with people in costume other than Santa, so I wasn't sure how it would go. Belle was a bit overwhelming for her, but after awhile she decided that the princesses weren't so bad.

After our breakfast, we headed back to the front of the park to finally ride some rides! L and I went on Soarin' and we got FastPasses for Test Track. L had read in his book Walt Disney World for Kids about the Kim Possible experience, so we went and did several of the missions. Grabbed lunch in the American Experience (no comment). Had great weather and enjoyed the day.

Day two was spent at Animal Kingdom in the morning. We hit Kilimanjaro Safaris and met some more characters. These did not go over as well with K as they were in furry costumes and my kid has some strange fear to anything with fur. No I'm not joking. We then headed to Dinoland USA. We grabbed lunch there, played in the Boneyard for a bit and went back to our room for a bit. K is not a good "nap on the go" kinda gal and she was increasingly cranky. So while BBD and K napped, L and I explored the resort before dinner. We decided to hit Epcot again and ride some rides we didn't get to the day before dinner.

Dinner that night was at Whispering Canyon Cafe at Wilderness Lodge. I was determined to try some new places on this trip. I loved this place! Food was great and they had a stick horse race around the restaurant for the kids (L participated, K did not). It had really yummy BBQ and great dessert. I loved the loudness and the fun.

Day three was at Hollywood Studios, where L had been the most excited to visit. He loves the Wii game Toy Story Mania and was ready to play it there. We started the morning with the Playhouse Disney character breakfast. Our early time allowed us to get this great shot:

I was a bit disappointed the Playhouse Disney characters. Jo-Jo and Goliath from the no longer aired "Jo-Jo's Circus" were there along with June and Leo from "Little Einsteins". You would think that Disney would pay attention to the shows that are currently airing and change the characters here accordingly. L barely remembered Jo-Jo. This meal was torture for K as she now hates all characters. Which means fun times for BBD and I. The redeeming quality: Mickey waffles on the buffet!

As soon as we finished, we ran over to Toy Story Mania to get FastPasses. We met Buzz and Woody and headed to explore the park. We went to Muppetvision 3D, in the Honey I Shrunk the Kids playground, at lunch at Pizza Planet (L was so excited!), used our FP, saw Playhouse Disney Live (which K loved), and then went to get L in line for Jedi Training Academy. If you have a kid 4-12 who likes Star Wars, it's worth the wait to get them in. We waited through the parade and one other session before getting him in and he still talks about it. Basically, 15 kids are chosen to see if they can become padawans. There is a Jedi master who trains the kids with "training lightsabers" and then Darth Vader shows up. Each kid gets the chance to battle Darth Vader before being named padawans and receiving a certificate. Each session is about 20 minutes and times are listed on the "Times and Information Guide" found by the maps at the park entrance. L in action:

Dinner that night was at the Sci-Fi Drive In, which is one of my favs, but I had never eaten there for dinner. One of the best meals by far and L was entertained by the movie previews shown on the big screen. After dinner we headed back to the hotel for some quiet time and much needed rest.

Day four was Magic Kingdom day and L's birthday! We got up and headed straight for the park. We rode the Magic Carpet ride and explored a bit before heading to the Pirates League. When we got there, we were told that they were running about 20 mins. behind so we rode Pirates of the Caribbean and got back just in time to get started. The Pirates League is kind of like the boy version of the ever popular Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique, but instead of becoming princes they become pirates. Girls are welcome to become pirate princesses if they so choose. L picked out the face he wanted and then he received his pirate name, was taken to a makeup chair and given the pirate oath. Once he received his sword, we were led into a room where no pictures were allowed as he hunted for treasure located in the room. L the pirate "Bartholomew Keelkidd":

Lunch was at the Diamond Horseshoe, a quiet quick service place with huge sandwiches. Then we hit Fantasyland and all it's fun. We watched the parade and enjoyed a snack while K napped then headed for Tomorrowland and the boys rode some rides while I had K.

Dinner that night was at Chef Mickey's, where we were all excited to see Mickey and pals. I have to say, every other restaurant we had been to had made a big deal about birthdays. Logan was given a pin to wear that day and he was wished "Happy Birthday" by most cast members and other people in the park. Chef Mickey's was a bit disappointing. Yes, he got his birthday cupcake with a candle, but there was no big deal made about it. I was a sad but he didn't care and that's really all that matters, right?

The rest of the week was spent hopping from park to park. I am a huge fan of the park hopper option. I love the flexibility, especially with K still napping. We took full advantage of it.

On Friday, L went on a pirate adventure at the resort. Disney does these at 6 different resorts and each is a little different. They are for kids 4-12 and no parents are allowed. L was a little hesitant to go, but made a friend as soon as we got to the dock and never looked back. K was a bit upset that we were leaving L, but calmed down quickly. He still won't tell us much about it, but I did get a shot of him passing our hotel room:

We ended the week at Downtown Disney, meeting some of BBD's family that live in Tampa for lunch at T-Rex. K hadn't been scared by anything but characters all week, but this place scared the pants off of her. She barely ate from being so scared. We actually couldn't help but laugh because we had been on scarier rides and she hadn't even flinched. L made his own lightsaber at "Once Upon a Toy" and K got her princess shirt.

We left WDW tired but happy. I am ready to go back when K is old enough to enjoy it more. Or next week is someone will sponsor me. A few things I'll do differently next time:

• Kids will need a separate room or we will stay in a Disney Vacation Club villa. Before job loss, we had plans to buy into DVC, but that will have to wait. L had the hardest time going to sleep at night with us still awake. Plus, K probably won't be in a portable crib then either.

• Fly an airline with more flexibility. I loved the price of the airfare, but it limited out travel times and we lost a day because of it.

I'm sure there are more things, but I can't think of them now.

I already miss the "happiest place on Earth".

Staying Positive

I am trying to stay positive about my job outlook. It's getting harder and harder every day. I broke down in front of my kids the other day and immediately hated myself for it. Logan has more faith in myself than I do right now and I don't like it, not one little bit.

So I'm working on focusing on other things, like our upcoming trip to Walt Disney World. I'm sure you are thinking, how is an unemployed woman taking her family to Disney. Well, we planned this trip right before I lost my job and made the decision to continue with it afterwards. It may have not been the best decision money wise (which countless people have commented on, thanks for that, I really need to be told it was a bad decision) but what's done is done and we will be leaving in 17 days.

I'm focusing on the fact that Logan will be turning five (OMG, where did the time go?) while we are in Disney. That the focus will be on HIM that week. Kaelin's just along for the ride.

I'm focusing on planning a small gathering to celebrate Logan's birthday once we return.

I'm focusing on being a stay at home mom for a while. We had been keeping Kaelin in daycare in hopes that my job loss would be brief and we wouldn't have to disrupt her world too many times, but as a cost cutting measure, we are pulling her out for a while. Hopefully, it won't be hard to find something when I do get a job.

I'm focusing on myself. I'm working out again since injuring myself doing EA Active for the Wii and then being sick with the never ending cold. I'm not doing this for weight loss, although losing a few pounds would be great, I doing this because I'm tired of sitting and waiting.

So here's to staying positive! Let's hope that it's the start of some very good things to come...

6 months ago

Six months have passed since I lost my job.

I've applied for over 160 jobs. Been on countless interviews. And yet, here I sit, in my yoga pants, on my couch.

This is getting ridiculous. Really ridiculous. I've said it before, I don't deserve to be here. I deserve to be employed. I deserve a job with a supervisor who appreciates my skills. My family deserves to have the income that I should be earning, instead of my crap unemployment check that arrives later and later every week.

Damn it, someone hire me already. I am a really good employee. Dedicated, loyal, and dependable.

In other news... I've blogged two days in a row. Go me!

I need to be a better blogger

Blog, I have failed you. I haven't posted a new post in weeks. So I'm recommitting myself to you. I am have a new post at least two times a week, if not more. Not all my posts will be long and lengthy, but I will be paying more attention to you.

I will blog about whatever is on my mind. I won't hold back. People might not want to read you, but I will still post.

I promise.

A proud Big Blue Fan moment

The header of my blog says that I love sports. I do. ESPN is regularly on my TV even if Big Blue Daddy isn't home. I grew up in a house that "bleeds blue" and can't remember NOT watching college basketball. As I've grown up, I've started to follow more sports. First came college football. That was a natural transition as I was in college at the time and tailgating and football are what you do on football Saturdays in the Bluegrass (if you aren't going to Keeneland, that is). UK has never had the best football team, but games are fun to watch and I began to actually understand the rules behind football. I also watched college hockey as the UK hockey team played at midnights. I would watch and eat chocolate covered coffee beans to stay awake. Big Blue Daddy introduced me to the NFL and through him I became a New Orleans Saints fan. Logan was the one that opened my eyes to hockey. One day last year he came downstairs after nap and asked to turn the TV on. It was on a hockey game and he sat down and asked if he could watch it. I told him he could and he fell in love. He's a huge Pittsburgh Penguins fan and now, so am I.

But that's not the point of this post. I'm proud of the Pens winning the Stanley Cup. I'm proud of UK's football team going to four bowl games in a row. I'm proud of the Saints making it to the NFC Championship game this Sunday. I'm proud of UK's men's basketball team being undefeated so far this season.

But I'm most proud of things happening off the court (or field as the case may be).

Heath Evans (Full Back for the NO Saints) is holding a raffle for 4 tickets to this Sunday's NFC Championship game. All proceeds benefit The Heath Evans Foundation, a foundation dedicated to helping victims and their families of childhood sexual abuse. Tickets start at $2.00 each and the more you buy the price goes down. Click here for more info or to purchase tickets.

Drew Brees is selling "Finish Strong" t-shirt to benefit his foundation. The team is asking people to purchase these in an effort to blackout the dome for this week's game.

Both of these are great causes but something happened this past Sunday here in the Bluegrass that isn't getting the attention it deserves.

On Sunday, Coach John Calipari and the UK men's basketball team held a telethon called "Hoops for Haiti". Coach Cal acted as a host and the team answered the phones and took donations for the first televised segment. It lasted 5 hours. In that 5 hours, over $525,000 dollars was donated. In addition, Coach Cal had a group of people willing to match whatever amount was raised. So all told, over $1 million was raised in a few short hours. That's not including t-shirt sales and wine sales from a local vineyard. Or the online auction that ended Tuesday.  Former UK Coach Tubby Smith called in and made a donation. So did Syracuse coach Jim Boeheim, Texas coach Rick Barnes, Cincinnati Bengals head coach Marvin Lewis and ESPN's own Dickie V.

And no one is talking about it.

Now I know this wasn't done to get publicity. It was done to help out a nation dealing with a horrible tragedy. But I can't help but feel that if this had been done by a couple of coaches in North Carolina, it would be all over the news. Sports radio host Dan Patrick even said so on his show this morning. It's not fair that the media picks and chooses who to spotlight based on whether they like them or not. It's no secret that people have very strong opinions about Coach Cal. However you may feel about him, you can't deny what happened in a Lexington TV studio Sunday afternoon.

As a proud member of Big Blue Nation, I am proud of what the team and its fans did for the people of Haiti. Good job guys!

2010 is not being nice to me...

... and we are only 5 days into the new year.

It started off so well. Big Blue Daddy and I went out for New Year's Eve without kids for the first time in forever with another couple. Drinking was involved and the other couple started a bit earlier than we did. We went to Harry's and ate appetizers and drinks. Yummy stuff! We actually went home before midnight and managed to stay awake until 12:05 before we crashed. After kids, you forget how to stay up late. Even got to sleep in the next day and get the Christmas decorations down before the kids returned, sick.

And that's when things started downhill.

Three rejection letters for jobs, one I thought I had for sure.

Two sick kids. Logan's week to bring snacks means I get up early after a rough night and take them in.

Buying the aforementioned snacks, the battery in my car died. It's colder than cold outside.

Remembering that the tags on one car expired in December. DOH! Can't take sick kids to renew them.

So I'm definitely not starting the year off on the right foot. I'm not ready to give up on you yet, 2010. I'm positive there are good things in my future. I just know it. I know the sickness in my house won't last forever. I know Big Blue Daddy will be promoted or he will find a job where he's appreciated. I'm going to Disney World for Logan's birthday. I will have a job that I love. It's all going to turn around soon.

I just know it!